Signifying nothing

Thrown out , originally uploaded by Theorris . Don't fall down in the street, please. If you do, make sure you crawl back to the gutter.

The sign says it all! , originally uploaded by catinlap . Indeed it does. "Haze" has to be the worst code word for smog I've ever heard. "Inversion" is just about as bad, but as it doesn't sound pleasant like "haze" and therefore I will deride the usage of "haze" more than "inversion." I give pause to think of the chemical stew that abides in the air at this point. This stew comes from one major source now: the beloved automobile. Thanks to Catinlap for the excellent photo. Please move now or just stop driving so damn much. (I'm doing penance for renting that fucking truck.)

Aspens in winter #4 , originally uploaded by Theorris .

TheOrris and his truck. , originally uploaded by catinlap . Told you. Merry Xmas! I couldn't aks for more! "He sees you when your sleeping! He knows when you are on the can!" (Bonus candy to anyone who gets my obscure reference.)

Cliche Christmas card photo , originally uploaded by Theorris . Happy ding dang to you all.

I am at a car rental place where, as in classic Seinfeld mode they apparently know how to take a reservation, but they don't know how to keep it. They have to fetch me a car from hither and yon. They say 15 minutes. I'm betting 30. I rent a car most Christmases since I have no car and visiting family and friends on non-existent holiday transport is impossible. I suppose I should write more about my experiment in refusing to own a car in a car-based culture (and I have occasionally, I suppose) but it seems insufferable to keep doing it. Suffice it to say, I like my choice generally (although it makes dating awkward). Whenever I fill out one of those carbon footprint calculators, my score comes up teensy. But back to why I am sitting her writing: the kind car rental agents offered me a truck for triple the rate of the car. How nice of them! They are also now pressing the collision damage insurance, which is a load of bollocks in that my credit card covers it all (trust m...

In my various adventures since I last rapped at you, I picked up Anthony Everitt's new biography Augustus: The Life of Rome's First Emperor to fill the time while moving about the country with my tray table in its prostrate and unlocked position. The book is an interesting exploration of Augustus' life and Everitt admits quite frequently that we know little of the man based upon contemporaneous record simply because Augustus was an example of the quintessential autocratic politician: image control was everything and political secrets could make or break an administration. For example, at one point very late in his life Augustus went on a super-secret mission to visit his ne'er-do-well nephew Agrippa Posthumous (whom the princeps had adopted as his own son and would have succeeded him if he would have behaved better). When a senator who accompanied him on the tripped blabbed the top secret news to his wife, the man mysteriously died and his wife wailed at his fun...

Action on the mountain! , originally uploaded by Theorris . There you go. I'm outa here. Enjoy blogging silence. Go bid the cannons shoot!

crisp. , originally uploaded by catinlap . And I'll get to Scotland before ye.

Wilhelm Action Tree! , originally uploaded by Theorris . This year for the Wilhelm Annual Xtreme Xmas Xxtravaganza X-Tree we decided to put the many many many action figures we all have collected to good decorative use. Look closely and you will spy Wilhelm Wookie too. He's up at the top by Jesus and the Rancor. You can make out many of Jesus's pals in the tree throughout including the boxing rabbi, Amish, and Alien. And yeah, its a live tree. My carbon foot print is small as it is so I don't need your guff. Actually I do feel badly about it, but it was a farmed tree, grown for this purpose. It had its time to absorb our excess carbon. My housemates, however, have never had a live tree before last year and I felt badly for them, so agreed to get a real cut tree. It is nice to be a little primeval, however, and bring the pagan green inside. Our tree, however, is thoroughly religious, in that Jesus, a rabbi, the Amish, Santa, and a skeleton, represent their religion...

You nearly walk out the door with your shirt on inside-out You then actually check to make sure you are wearing pants. You wake up in the middle of the night in a sweat having dreamed that you forgot to go to a class for the entire semester and now it is the last day. You feel that email is a tool of the devil put on earth to enslave us and destroy our will to live. You realize that your supply of clothes is surprisingly resilient despite lack-of-laundry doing. You only think in terms of numbered lists.

The neighbor kitty-corner to the Wilhelm (my un-humble abode) have a pair of those decorative lit-up deer. You know the sort: stick frames formed into the shape of deer and bestrewn with Christmas lights. Well these deer are apparently the object of holiday culture jamming on the part of the neighborhood teens. Twice now in so many days I've witnessed groups of teens--two to rearrange the unsuspecting festive decorations and one to man the getaway car--attempting to rearrange the would-be deer into compromising sexual positions. Each time they have failed, however, due to the vigilance of my geriatric neighbor. I would take a picture of the kids' failure, but I fear my cantankerous neighbor would think I was in on the gag. I also don't really want him shouting at me to stay off his lawn.