Coldcuts for the statistician's soul

Karmaking has challenged me on his blog to take the following survey that he originally found out at Kendrakoo's.

Here goes nothing:

1. Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 18, and find line 4. - On the 18th page, the 4th line says: "They took their three mothers' blessings, they made no distinction between them, and came to their father's court."

2. Stretch your left arm out as far as you can. What can you touch? Empty space.

3. What is the last thing you watched on TV? Dallas vs. Miami. Dallas kicked their asses.

4. Without looking, guess what time it is. 3:30?

5. Now look at the clock. What is the actual time? 2:43. Zoid, I'm 45 minutes ahead!

6. With the exception of the computer, what can you hear? Siouxie Sioux's group The Creatures playing on my computer. The aquarium gurgling away letting me know I need to put water in it. The wind rusting the aspen tree next door. A couple of cars passing by.

7. When did you last step outside? What were you doing? 15 minutes ago. I walked to the corner market (ok it is a Tesoro, but it sounds cooler if I call it a market). I also thought about deadheading one of the rose bushes in the north paddock (ok it is not a paddock, but it sounds cooler if I call the sideyard that.)

8. Before you started this survey, what did you look at? I looked at my other computer that is burning a DVD I am making.

9. What are you wearing? A white shirt that I get compliments from women on. My olive drap cargo shorts and my tevas.

10. Did you dream last night? Not that I recall.

11. When did you last laugh? I laughed when I thought about the Eagles of Death Metal watching my stupid wookie video.

12. What is on the walls of the room you are in? 3 paintings, a pastel sketch, a photgraph, and the doorbell.

13. Seen anything weird lately? Cat vomit on the carpet.

14. What do you think of this quiz? It made me notice the cat vomit, which I am now going to clean up.

15. What is the last film you saw? This is really bad, but I don't remember. I think some really bad Kevin Bacon movie where he turns invisible and sings to butt rock in his Porsche.

16. If you became a multi-millionaire overnight, what would you buy? A ranch where I could set up a cool small liberal-arts college for folks who do not have all the advantages in life. I'd hire many people I know to teach there and we'd have a grand old time.

17. Do you like to dance? Nope and it is a good thing since I am the crapiest dancer around.

What happened to 18 & 19? I told them to get off the bus.

20. George Bush: is our current president who although there are things he could have done better in his tems, he has held the nation together through times of great parrel.
First of all was this question written by Bush? Anyway aside from spelling peril correctly, I would say that I haven't seen so much acrimony in this country since--since--since--the last president. As one great mind put it, it is the obligation and the right of every American to hate or love the current President, not particularly in that order. Personally Bush is annoying: he is arrogant and walks like he has (as my father would have said) a board up his ass. Since I am an optomist I will say we will weather his terrible government and be the better for it.

21. Imagine your first child is a girl, what do you call her? Foxene.

22. Would you ever consider living abroad? I'll take Scandanavia any time. I like the dark, the cold, and making bathtub aqua vitae.

23. What do you want God to say to you when you reach the pearly gate? Where's my hat?

24. Four or Five people who must also do this quiz in THEIR journal: Late JC has to be up next. If Chak ever gets a blog he should do it too. Sarahbellum is a good candidate for someone I've never met, and Snyder too. As for the regular blogging crew: Hightouch, Dr., Counterintuitive, Mid-B, Sleepy, and Hip have to do it too.

18. & 19. I've been looking everwhere for you.